Borders

I just came back from Borders, the last remaining Borders in my area.  Last year they already closed one nearby, but now the two-story Borders in White Flint Mall is closing! Of the 200 stores to be closed because of the Chapter 11 bankruptcy file, they had to close the ones near me! :( It was a little upsetting to see "STORE CLOSING" signs plastered everywhere, yet it was so exciting to see books on sale.  When are books ever on sale?

When White Flint Mall replaces Borders, I hope they turn it into another bookstore. There's something about bookstores that beats the library and the nook. Sitting in the comfortable couches with the soothingly quiet atmosphere, the low background music, the light coffee smell, and the untouched pages of a book just feels so peaceful and relaxing. I'm definitely going to miss it.

xkcd: Bookstore

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Reflection: Philadelphia (1993)

One particular scene that stood out to me was when Miguel gets frustrated with Beckett when they are alone.  He throws the notebook Beckett was writing in and says, "The least you can do is look at me, and give me a little bit of your time."  It's a rather short scene, but after watching it for the second time I noticed that during the dialogue, the camera is looking directly at the speaker as if the audience were in the recipient's shoes.  The whole movie focuses so much on what AIDS is, how AIDS is transmitted, and AIDS discrimination that I was genuinely surprised to see this snippet of Miguel and Beckett interaction.  It's a very subtle dose of pathos, but the scene does have an emotional appeal to it.  You realize that the victim of AIDS is not just Beckett; it also impacts those close to him as well -- his lover and his family.  When Miguel is speaking directly to the camera, you notice how scared he is of losing Beckett.  Even though Miguel understands what Beckett is going through and is trying to support him, he is frustrated with Beckett because of his lack of attention to their relationship.  Beckett replies to Miguel/the audience, "You are worried...we don't have very much time left, now aren't you?"  These are precisely the thoughts that Miguel has in mind, or anyone who knows someone with AIDS.  It plays on the emotional appeal because of how the audience can easily relate to the two characters in the scene.

xkcd: Positive Attitude

Blogging Prompt #4: Experience and Other Evidence Final Topic Choices

For my paper, I have decided to research about ovarian cysts.  Three and a half years ago, I was diagnosed with an abnormally large ovarian cyst within my left ovary, although it was almost misdiagnosed as cancer.  Normally, the size of ovarian cysts ranges from a pea to an orange, but the one within my body grew to the size of a pineapple.  Usually, women experience abdominal pain when a cyst forms, but throughout the many years that it could have existed for, I never felt such pain.  During surgery, the gynecologist surgeon removed my no longer functioning ovary with the cyst inside, donating it to NIH.

My final paper will cover the different types of ovarian cysts and the range of symptoms that ovarian cyst carriers may experience.  It will also include doctors' various reactions on how to deal with their patients' cysts and the impact ovarian cysts may have on women, especially those planning on having children.  What exactly is an ovarian cyst?  What makes it grow to various sizes?  What are the different kinds of ovarian cysts?  What effects would a cyst have if a women is pregnant? What other effects are there with an ovarian cyst?

xkcd: Lego

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Blogging Prompt #3: The Experience and Other Evidence Memo

1.  In high school everyone noticed something was wrong with me.  I was in denial, thinking nothing was wrong because I felt completely healthy.  When I went to the doctor's though and my mom asked about the matter, he transferred me to several other clinics to get scans taken, and then I learned the truth.  I had an ovarian cyst, with a height of 7 inches, a width of 3 inches, and a depth of 2 inches, to be exact.  What had baffled the doctor was how I didn't feel pain.  With a tumor that large, surely I'd feel something.  What had baffled me was how the doctor couldn't detect anything the moment he realized my stomach was disproportionate to the rest of my body.  If he had noticed, why hadn't he referred me to get scans earlier?  If he had assumed I was pregnant at the age of 15 (with said non-existing baby incubating for a couple years then), why didn't he at least confront me with his concerns?  What was he so afraid of?  What are the causes of ovarian cyst, or rather, what allowed the cyst grow to such lengths?  If a cyst that great of a size had burst, would it be fatal?  An academic audience for this topic would be gynecologists, family doctors, other women with ovarian cysts, or researchers studying tumors.  My ovary and cyst were eventually sent to NIH, and I often wonder what happened after that.

2.  On the rare occasion that I become sleep deprived, I experience an event (sensation? disease? condition?) called sleep paralysis, in which the body "paralyzes" for REM sleep, but the mind is fully aware of one's surroundings and then hallucinations occur.  These hallucinations are usually terrifying, and I find myself unable to move the body, but I can "see" the room clearly and "hear" what goes on in the room.  I always feel like I'm in danger, sometimes lying on a surgical table or just seeing silhouettes of random figures hovering above me as if they were studying me.  Sometimes I see faint ghosts darting around the room, or I hear mythical creatures cackling as they speedily tap around my bed.  I've learned when these hallucinations are about to occur, which is when I'm lying on my back right before I fall asleep, so I can forcefully wake myself up and reposition my body so the hallucinations don't occur.  What I'd like to know is exactly what causes it, or if there are multiple factors that influence sleep paralysis.  I know that there are people that strongly believe alien abductions or ghost encounters occur during sleep paralysis, so what other beliefs are there among different cultures?  Is sleep paralysis simply just a nightmare?  This topic would be directed towards psychologists studying sleep or those interested in cultural studies.

3.  Last year my dad experienced a brain aneurysm, which is when an artery in the brain bursts.  It led to multiple brain strokes, which increased his blood pressure, intracranial pressure, brain damage, as well as his risk of dying.  Currently he's in a coma.  I'd like to say that I know for sure he's in a coma, but it's completely uncertain since the brain damage is so large.  But the only symptom we knew of before the artery burst was his prolonged headache.  He said that it felt like there was a hammer banging inside his head.  Are there any other symptoms that could possibly predict a brain aneurysm will occur?  Can it be prevented if an individual goes in for screening every now and then?  What created this balloon in his artery in the first place -- stress?  As a coma patient, are there any "techniques" that can stimulate a response from a brain that has been damaged to such an extent?  Other than regular physical therapy, are there any other ways to maintain the flexibility within the joints of a coma patient?  I've noticed my dad losing white hairs over time, but lately his white hairs' existence seem to have an odd cycle, what do coma patients experience?  Is it possible to feel stressed in a coma?  An academic audience would be neurologists, those involved with long term care patients, physical therapists, doctors, or those that have woken up from a coma.

xkcd: Candy Button Paper

Reflection: Illness as Metaphor/AIDS and its Metaphors

In Illness as Metaphor, Susan Sontag compares how similarly people treated those diagnosed with cancer in the 1970's to those diagnosed with tuberculosis decades before.  In AIDS and its Metaphors, Sontag again makes a comparison between society's response to AIDS and cancer.  What stood out to me wasn't the metaphor or her point to "de-mythicize" the conception of disease, it was realizing how unified humans are and how we can't help but cycle our response to such events (7).  Sontag includes other authors' novels in her book, a character "refuses to say 'tuberculosis'" because it will quicken the effects of the disease or how just saying "'cancer' is said to kill some patients" faster (6).  In both examples, the diseases of two different times have become "taboo" in conversation.  The way people treated cancer patients is so similar to the way people treated tuberculosis patients were treated, even if the diseases are so different.  It shows how human, how flawed, people are.  What happens when we can't heal people of their sickness?  Fear them.  Confine them.  Alienate them.  As ridiculous as that sounds, humans can't help but reverting to the same answer every time.  Every time, we go through a cycle of judgments, stereotypes, superstitions, realizations, and understandings, as if we never learn.

xkcd: Seismic Waves

Blogging Prompt #2: On Confessions

A confession stems from guilt.  It begins like a tumor, small, benign, seemingly harmless, but as you feed it with feelings of guilt and shame, it will grow to the point when you just want to let it out.  I believe a confession is when one knows and understands what he/she did wrong -- either from his/her own perspective or from society's perspective of what is right and what is wrong.  But a confession does not necessarily mean people feel sorry for their actions, and that is where the difference lies between a confession and an apology.

An apology stems from regret.  It is when people seek forgiveness, from G/god(s), family, friends, people of authority, or anyone for that matter.  People confess their "acts of sin" to another, hoping the other will no longer resent them for their actions.  Or people apologize when they understand someone else's feelings.  They say, "I'm sorry for your loss," because they understand the difficulty of losing a loved one.

When people confess, without looking for forgiveness, they may simply want to relieve themselves of their guilt.  The examples of confessions in Wear and Jones's "Bless Me Reader for I have Sinned" seem to be one-sided confessions; they aren't looking for a response.  When people confess to another, then they want to be forgiven.

Based on a writing assignment from the past, drawing from personal experiences in writing can be helpful.  We remember little details more vividly and can easily incorporate them into our writing, making it more personal and enticing.  But at the same time it can hinder writing because it becomes simple to lose the focus of the paper and dwell in an entirely different event from the past.

xkcd: Control

Blogging Prompt #1: The Writing Autobiography

Hi! Welcome to my blog!

My name is Tiffany, and I'm from Maryland, where I was born and raised.  I graduated from Thomas Wootton High School and now attend the University of Maryland as a General Biology major pursuing pre-optometry.  I've always found the study of life fascinating, but I find the study of eyes, ophthalmology, ten times more fascinating.

In high school all of the writing I did was assigned to me.  Most of the essays focused on argument, rhetoric, research, and literary analysis.  Then there were the occasional different pieces of writing, which included a short play, a short story, and writing and recording a personal podcast.  I see myself as a creative writer, but sometimes I get too excited over writing from my own inspirations that I get writer's block right from the start.  Aside from school assigned papers, I've done my fair share in blogging, including Xanga, Tumblr (although it personally didn't last long), and a couple of group blogs on blogger.  I never thought blogging would be incorporated into an English class, so I'm rather excited!

xkcd: Blagofaire